“Speak only if it improves upon the silence.” ― Mahatma Gandhi

Recently, someone I know  wanted real advice and asked me, “how can I change my life?”


Reading between the proverbial lines, I think they were referring to becoming happier with whatever career choice they were trying to make, plus wanted a “how to get fit for dummies” book.  Don’t get me wrong.  I’m not saying it isn’t a smart question.  It’s just a complicated one.  Somehow we have managed to hope that change is the catalyst for happiness… and suddenly happiness becomes elusive.  It hides in many forms.  We change our careers, our physiques and our relationship choices, so we can impact  our satisfaction with life.  Actually, it’s quite true… but ALL of it needs to happen.  Every aspect of these factors interact and are influenced by one another.  Health and happiness seem to be inseparable. Happiness appears to affect success and career satisfaction.  Everyone I ever met who becomes healthier also becomes happier.  Every single person.  Health, however, can take more than one form and ultimately both types of health, physical and emotional, seem to be immutably attached to real happiness.  Thus, there are TWO key points that I believe act as a fulcrum for the branches of happiness  that matter most:

  1. Be careful about what you put in your mouth……
  2. and about what comes out of it.

I once heard: “Watch your thoughts; you are always listening.”  By the way, YOU are not the only one that’s listening.  Beside’s the next-door neighbors eavesdropping sad dogand the co-workers you complain to…. have you noticed how everything,….dogs, cats, horses react to how we say things?  Words matter…. and that’s firmly attached to how we think.

There is so much evidence that the metaphysical will manifest the physical. Many of us have proven it to ourselves time and time again; yet somehow we manage to forget and fail to communicate with ourselves and others in a powerful and positive manner.deathandlife  Positive communicators are usually confident, successful people with high-self esteem and report maximal achievement of happiness in their lives as well as maximal satisfaction levels with their bodies and their career.  The two most sought-after conditions of success.  Chicken and egg, you say??  People with naturally great physiques are going to have superb levels of confidence.


Ok.  I’ll grant you that, but is it possible or even probable that they’ve never had a bad day?  Do you know of a fabulous athlete with a story about how disease, divorce or some natural disaster struck and “…their bodies & popularity just seemed to abandon them…”?   Chances are, if we understood just how much our thoughts (and therefore words) influenced every outcome, we would purposefully never have another negative thought.

Predictably, negative communicators tend to be under-confident; they often exhibit low or a lack of self-esteem which correlates quite strongly to varying forms of depression.  Interestingly, behavioral (psychotherapy) changes have been found to be a more successful form of treatment and resolution compared to pharmacotherapy (the prescription of drugs).

Im not listening


“Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habit. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.”

-Lao Tze


Truly very simple equation. Thoughts+Words X Eating Right = HAPPINESS

Watch your thoughts & words.

Be aware of what you put in your body.

Happiness is the destination.



About michellenihei

Bachelor of Science, University of Saskatchewan Diplomate in Veterinary Science, University of Saskatchewan Master of Science, University of Saskatchewan Doctor of Philosophy, University of Kentucky Post-Doctoral and Jr. Faculty, Johns Hopkins University, MD Assistant trainer to Christopher Speckert, Rebecca Maker, Todd Pletcher Independent business owner and racehorse trainer; StabelLab Evangelist
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10 Responses to “Speak only if it improves upon the silence.” ― Mahatma Gandhi

  1. Actually, words don’t matter worth a fig. It’s how you feel about the words.

    I know that sounds like quibbling but it’s a gigantic quibble, the kind that gets stuck in your soul. The truth is, you’ve got total control over how you decide to feel about anything, even stuff people are certain is bad. It’s all relative.

    Take the highly charged words God, love, and money. Depending on your experience with each, the sound of them in your ears will engender completely different emotions. A loving family experience at synagogue each week will produce a very different reaction than memories of three years of molestation as an altar boy. A grandparent who hugs you gently and says, “I love you,” feels differently than a boyfriend who hits you and says, “You make me crazy because I love you.” The mere mention of the word money will cause acid reflux in a person behind on their rent, yet the same person will wet themselves with joy to find a forgotten twenty in their pocket–does that make money good or bad?

    Forget words, concentrate on how you feel. You got your own special vocabulary for joy and pain, no need to copy off anyone else’s paper. What’s true for you is true, period.

    Ploosh is the sound a pebble makes when you toss it into a pond. Made it up. Feels good.

    • I agree….for the most part. Words still matter as does the energy behind how they are delivered. I think strong individuals are capable of filtering good from bad, others may not be. We are responsible for how we treat each other, ergo: the words we choose are important. If one chooses to live on the island of self-response and self-responsibility, then your words to yourself still matter. Seems to me, perhaps even more importantly….. I said that too, but it doesn’t feel made up and that feels good too.

  2. Ashley Heclo says:

    Very well said Michelle… a fine way to try and live our lives. Just the attempt at living in that direction can lead to big changes in our lives.

  3. Santa Hansen (are my facebook name) says:

    I must say i honoest dont know how i ended up on this side, but tt is stuff i like to read, well sometimes things happen for a reason. best regard fb. santa hansen (real name Lars) be kind to each other.

  4. “Watch your thoughts; you are always listening.” I absolutely love this quote and it’s so true! If only we as human beings held ourselves to as much worth as we hold others.

  5. Kevin Wild says:

    This is not a Ghandi quote.
    Originally by Shiridi Sai Baba long before.

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